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ZL3AI > HUMOUR 09.02.04 13:05l 81 Lines 3125 Bytes #999 (0) @ WW
BID : 2789-ZL3AI
Read: DH0GHU GUEST DL4NWM
Subj: Weightloss/Fathers/Printer
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Sent: 040209/1032Z @:ZL3VML.#80.NZL.OC #:18728 [Chch-NZ] FBB7.00i $:2789-ZL3AI
From: ZL3AI@ZL3VML.#80.NZL.OC
To : HUMOUR@WW
Weightloss Pills
----------------
I recently went to the doctor for a check-up, he checked me out thoroughly
doing various tests, etc. He then went back to his table and sat down.
"I'm prescribing these pills for you," he then said, scribbling some weird
name on the prescription pad,
"I don't want you to swallow them. Just spill them on the floor twice a day
and pick them up, one at a time."
Fathers then and now (Received from and American friend)
--------------------
In 1900, fathers prayed their children would learn English.
Today, fathers pray their children will speak English.
In 1900, if a father put a roof over his family's head, he was a success.
Today, it takes a roof, deck, pool, and 4-car garage. And that's just the
vacation home.
In 1900, a father waited for the doctor to tell him when the baby arrived.
Today, a father must wear a smock, know how to breathe, and make sure film
is in the video camera.
In 1900, fathers passed on clothing to their sons.
Today, kids wouldn't touch Dad's clothes if they were sliding naked down an
icicle.
In 1900, fathers could count on children to join the family business.
Today, fathers pray their kids will soon come home from college long
enough to teach them how to work the computer and set the VCR.
In 1900, fathers pined for old country Romania, Italy, or Russia.
Today, fathers pine for old country Hank Williams.
In 1900, fathers shook their children gently and whispered, "Wake up, it's
time for school."
Today, kids shake their fathers violently at 4 a.m., shouting: "Wake up,
it's time for hockey practice."
In 1900, a father came home from work to find his wife and children at the
supper table.
Today, a father comes home to a note: "Jimmy's at baseball, Cindy's at
gymnastics, I'm at gym, Pizza in fridge."
In 1900, fathers and sons would have heart-to-heart conversations while
fishing in a stream.
Today, fathers pluck the headphones off their sons' ears and shout,
"WHEN YOU HAVE A MINUTE.."
In 1900, a father gave a pencil box for Christmas, and the kid was all smiles.
Today, a father spends $800 at Toys 'R' Us, and the kid screams: "I wanted
XBox!"
Blonde At The Printer?
----------------------
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet Division for
about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't
solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine,
which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and
yellow. For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green
printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow.
I had the customer change ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and
reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my co-workers for help; they
offered no new ideas.
After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer
to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I
try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow construction
paper?"
ARGH!!! (Could she have been a blonde?)
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