| |
ZS6CFC > TREK 24.11.03 19:58l 100 Lines 2389 Bytes #999 (0) @ WW
BID : C31840ZS6CFC
Read: DB0FHN GUEST
Subj: Re: Starfleet Captain Redneck/
Path: DB0FHN<DB0RGB<DB0FSG<DB0PV<DB0MRW<OK0PKL<OK0PPL<DB0RES<ON0BEL<ZS6FB<
ZS0DLD
Sent: 031124/1345Z @:ZS0DLD.PTA.GAU.ZAF.AF #:57994 [Pretoria] $:C31840ZS6CFC
From: ZS6CFC@ZS0DLD.PTA.GAU.ZAF.AF
To : TREK@WW
Hello and welcome
This is the South African version of :
A Flaarsteed Captain is considered, red up to the neck if:
1) - your shuttlecraft has been working. Period
2) - he paints Sata Clauses on warp nacelles
3) - you have a shuttle called go! GOGO! GO! GO!...
4) - he refers to any intelligent race as " Racists"
5) - he refers to Photon Torpedoes as " Necklace"
6) - he has a sensor array-a bent coathanger and alu-foil.
7) - he installs TV1-2-3 on the front of the saucers
-section
8) - he says" Wapppappapppa" instead of " EH?"
9) - His viewscreen is fuzzzier than any dice...
10) - communication? Eh....Hubba?
11) - his command chair is an empty orange crate, and the
gun rack...forget it.
12) - his force windscreen is playing
Beer commmercials - in emergencies.
13) - nothing but nothing will replace the 9 mil auto!
14) - his executive is called "Bubba" (He really is!)
15) - Whats Bassmaster---Eh, run all in the prayr...oops
16) - The food replicator cant do anything else as
Beer,ribs, pap and vleis...and -oh yes- burp by itself...
17) - Starship pink- all the way...
19) - Mutura Nebula?... Olifants Stasie !
20) - who needs moonshine, we got Mampoer!
21) - Oh...hicshs ,Sikhelele...hiksh...Af..af
22) - Dress uniform? - Ehhh...Mhhh...welll
23) - nothing beats a "liver - up" on the bridge in the
morning...after..or... warp...
24) - Gas Giant? Impressive... for a 100 watt globe that is.
We have better things in government...
25) His phaser is set to "well-done"
26) - Gotta have a dozen boxes of superglue! Right Chief?
27) - The warp reactor...if it can be found...well...thats
where the superglue comes in...
28) - Sickbay has only castor oil and muti. And 2 band-aids.
29) - He doesnt smoke. Not with these gas giants on board...
30) - Ah, yes, cargo...What is it?...Eh...Pap?
31) - Kobiyashi Maru...All Bullseye...Eh... from a foot?
32) - Warp, warp, steady as she go...Im gonna be sick!
33) - the ship, all the shuttlecraft and the numeral mascots
are named after African chiefs. And all send photon
torpedoes for that...
34) - Oh...rats...make that so!
What?
Eh?...Whatever...lets go back home!
We havent left Station yet!
Shucks...I knew there where problems...Open Hail freqency to
Winnie!
73 DE Sten ZS6CFC@ZS0DLD.PTA.GAU.ZAF.AF
Message timed : 15:42 on 24 Nov 2003
Read previous mail | Read next mail
| |
